When is doing too much too much?

Short Answer: When your body gives you the middle finger.

Long Answer: When your body gives you the middle finger.  We’ve all had those days when you’re short of breath, low on fuel or just haven’t worked out for a long time. I had one of those today. I ate a ‘healthy’ light lunch at noon, and then in the frenzy that is work I forgot to grab a snack before leaving for my bike workout. Didn’t drink enough water at my desk either. I show up at the Velloway today well ahead of time. People take a while to show up (note to self: leave later next week) and it’s 6.30 before we’re ready to start, 45 minutes after I got there. In the middle of Coach Liz’s long instructions I realize I am famished. I hope my body can manage the 10 mile ride we’re supposed to do with interval.

But I’m no Superman. Or rather I am Superman plus the Kryptonite. Did the 3 mile loop okay (with practice to lift my hand off the handle bars to get used to riding with one hand: good tip – look ahead, not down when you do that). Stopped to drink water after that loop (because I cannot drink while riding, hence the hand-off-the-bar practice) and I nearly passed out. The asst coach Carol poured some water over my neck and I took a short break. Interval training didn’t happen much as I just wanted to get the distance in but I was weak! The chain came off a couple of times and the second time, a kind roller-skater helped me but I was feeling too weak to say thank you! Somehow finished the 9 mile loop (got over the crazy sharp-turn-then-crazy-hill all 3 times, which probably took some energy off). We were supposed to do a 1 mile run after (called a brick, ’cause your legs feel like bricks after the bike), but I decided to skip it.

On the drive back I had a 1000 thoughts go through my head. First, the sense of weakness was pervasive, it didn’t go after a while. I got a choco milk from Marion and felt a bit better but not much. So it wasn’t just lack of food. Yeah, I know your body is like an engine and if you got no gas, you can’t go far. I get that. Then I got gas, got some rest but I still felt tired and weak. And then, I remembered I have been feeling tired all week. In fact I even skipped doing anything last week, including tri-training.

Yeah, tri-training is not hunky dory. Its been lack-lustre so to speak. I mean, it’s ok, I can do the distance, individually. Gotta put it all together on race day too. But the issues are bigger. I’ve got way too much going on. Work is extremely busy. I’m taking music lessons and I have absolutely no intention to quit that (but I don’t have any time to practice so it’s like being stuck at the same place). And I try to volunteer for Asha as much as I can. End result: other than work, everything else sucks because I feel half-assed about it.

Last week it got too much. I just took off. Didn’t go to my bike workout on Saturday, slept in. Didn’t cook or clean even. Just sat on the couch and ate. Then the guilt got to me so I went to the swim workout and felt better, a bit. But the weight on my head has been pulling me two ways. Every morning I wake up and one little devil says, screw it all – there’s too much going on. The other little devil says, get up, go run, or bike or swim. It’s like having a mini meltdown.

I talked to Manasi a bit about how overwhelmed I was feeling. She said something useful. Said I should ask myself why I do, everything that I do, that I want to do. It doesn’t have to be a significant reason, it just has to make sense, to me. Frankly, haven’t had time to do that thinking yet! And the truth is, I want to do everything I do and I want to do it well. But until I can understand the real reasons why I do them and figure out a way to fit it all in, I’ll just keep doing them I guess.


2 responses to “When is doing too much too much?

  1. nice post! I think we all are very guilty of putting way too much on our plates, till it spills and we realize that we took on too much. I totally agree with “other than work, everything else sucks because I feel half-assed about it.”, I too feel the same sometimes. But I think the key is to not think of (as cliched as it sounds) them as a clutter of tasks, but rather as one task at a time. Over the years our new generation has handled the multitasking very well, it is probably because we eventually learn to channel each task as if it was individual, while doing them all around the same timeframe.
    You can do it, otherwise you wouldn’t take it on! 🙂 Hang in there, every thing will fall in place.
    As for the tri training, it is a royal pain the backside as you are training for three things simultaneously. The good thing is that you are following a training schedule, which in time will become more normal. Good luck!

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